Itchy Feet

Between the book that I'm currently reading, actually devouring, and watching episodes of The Long Way Down on the National Geographic Channel (if you're not working (like me), or considering shagging off work on Monday they're running a marathon of the ten episode series started at 10 AM Central Time) I've got the urge to have my own motorcycle adventure . . . granted it'll have to wait after all I am locked in the heart of winter and I think that I should get a larger bike for it, even if Ms. Pryce did make her journey from Alaska to the Southern Tip of South America on the same bike that I own (albeit different years), me on the bike is like two of her.

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If you've never had the urge for such a trip yourself, perhaps the series (or McGregor & Boorman's other trip the Long Way Round) and the book will make you think that maybe this is something that I want to do as well . . . although it would be hard to get the kind of support that The Long Way guys got for the average person like you or I.

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Well best be going now, almost time for another TV series that makes me want to take a little trip.

Happy Boxing Day . . . Sale?

I thought I'd share this since I got another email about Signals having another 20% off everything in their clearance section sale. Apparently the prices not valid on previous orders, and are only valid on in stock items and only for internet sales. Enter the code BOXING into the coupon code field upon checkout to receive your discount. Discount applies ONLY to Outlet section of online store.

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You must click to Signals.com to take advantage of any possible price mark down. Discount can not be combined with any other offers. Offer expires 11:59 P.M. E.S.T. January 6, 2009.

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What on Earth has emailed me about a 20% off their Outlet Sales Section Boxing Day sale as well, so here's the info. Like Signals the prices are not valid on previous orders, and are only valid on in stock items and for internet sales. Enter Coupon Code AFTRXMAS upon checkout to receive your discount. Sale ends at 11:59pm EST on January 9, 2009.

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Now I'm off to Futureshop to see if they want to give me a really really big TV for a really really small price.

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And of yeah, happy Boxing Day, don't forget to give your butler, or favourite blogger for that matter, a nice token of appreciation.

Jump in bed and cover your head . . .

. . . because Santa Claus is coming to town.

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Just in case you're one of the Lucas fanboys (speaking of Fanboys, just when is that movie acutally going to be released?) who's still under the general disillusion that George makes quality entertainment and cares about anything other than making that money money yeah yeah here's an article that will set you straight, break your heart and/or cause you to wax philosophical about the Star Wars Holiday Special. Anyway it looks like a stage production of Star Wars is going to be going into production and will be premiering next year at London's O2 Arena.

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No matter this might be favourite piece of George Lucas TV ever.

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That's enough Lucas slagging don't you think? In order to bring things back up how's about listening to Tucson's Hot Club band rock the Cantina Song from Star Wars?

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And for a bit of Star Wars history, how about checking out some of the early storyboards for the 1st film/episode four from long long ago in a studio far far away back before the Millennium Falcon was cool looking. Pretty cool eh? I'm not totally gay for Star Wars like some I know but I have to admit it's pretty cool getting such a behind the scenes peek at a bit of geek history.

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Ever notice how the best solutions to a problem are the simplest? Well this is fucking brilliant; seems that teens in Montgomery County have found a sweet way to exact revenge on people and screw with speed cameras at the same time.

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Step 1 - borrow a car similar to the one driven the person you want to screw over.

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Step 2 - print out a fake plate that matches that of the person you want to screw over and tape it over the plate on your car.

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Step 3 - run the speed camera.

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Step 4 - enjoy the fruits of your labour.

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I told you simple and brilliant. I don't know someone didn't come up with this before.

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Well that's her for now, but I will leave you with one last bit. I don't know about you, but if this were a TV show I'd watch it.

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And oh yeah, have a merry fucking Christmas.

Looks like we're down to two more sleeps until the jolly fat man slides down your chimney, wink wink nudge nudge say no more say no more, so perhaps it's still not too late for you to score a holiday honey. This guide to holiday romance should help you out some. If it doesn't help it might make you laugh a little.

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It's no secret (man I use that phrase a lot don't I?) that I'm not too keen on the old holidays, but for some reason this sounds like a lot of fun, I mean who isn't into guerrilla street theatre, pranksterism, and public intoxication? It's too late for this year, but who's up for some Santarchy next year in Winnipeg or something.

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I'd like to add my collection of ink someday (does one piece count as a collection? No matter here's some work by the guy who did my hot rod flames) and there are some rather sweet pieces in these pictures from a tattoo convention held in Budapest at the end of November.

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Maybe instead of clean lines and quality art work you prefer your tats more full of fail and spelling errors. If so these are totally up your alley.

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And I will leave you with this picture of what I think is an awesome tattoo. I think I'm in love . . . again. Oh wait . . . there it passed.

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Until next time.

Mother of the Year Nominees

To follow up on yesterday's parents of the year nominees here are some nominees for mother of the year, you know it's not too late to submit your own photos.

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Good luck?

Parents of the Year Nominees

Hey well it's nearing the year's end so you've still got a little time to get your votes in for the parents of the year. Here are photos of a few of the nominees.

Hopefully you aren't in any of these pics.

I'll tell you who I am . . .

. . . I'm a Repo Man.

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Here's some good news for the punkers/fans of cult films; according to this article a Repo Man sequel is going to start filming next month. Could this be another classic destroyed before our very eyes? Only time will tell.

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Speaking of classics, remember the Macho Man Randy Savage? Of course you do, or perhaps I should have said "ooooooooooooooooooooh yeah!". Ever wonder what he's up to these days? Well I can't answer that question, but I can say that here's a current pic of Savage, or at least it's supposed to be him. For all I know it could be an old washed country music star.

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I think that after seeing these pics, Sweden might a great place to go out on the town in and watch beautiful women from across the bar and not talk to them. Maybe I can go there after I have my fill of beer, brats and girls kissing girls at Oktoberfest.

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Although after reading this article about nine British women who were charged with prostitution after being arrested for taking part in an oral sex competition (I guess they were charging admission?), I just may have to hit up the Greek holiday island of Zakynthos.

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But I'm thinking that maybe Greece isn't the place to be after seeing these pictures of the riots that broke out there as a result of police shooting a teen. There's some quality, albeit shocking, photography in there and once again I have a new appreciation for the safety and even keelness of living where I do, even if it is -33 Celsius outside right now . . . but what would you do if you went outside in December and the snot in your nose didn't freeze with your first inhalation of breath?

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And today I'll leave you with a new twist on a holiday classic, The ASBO Before Christmas, brought to you by the man who wrote the book The ASBO Fairy Tales.

Is it a bird? Is it a plane?

No! It's Heroics! An ITV sitcom about superheroes who bitch and moan and with this season of Heroes being the weakest yet (Hey know what would be awesome? Everyone time travels all the time except for when it would makes sense.), but strangely enough still decent television which speaks volumes about the state of television, or at least the TV I watch, this might just be what the Doctorb (the 'b' is for bargain) ordered. Even if it's not don't you just love the premise of it?

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You know what else is good TV? Lucy Daughter of the Devil that's what. It's a great one season cartoon show currently airing on Teletoon about, you guessed it, Lucy who is the anti-Christ, spawn of Satan and a human woman (in exchange for a Datsun 280-ZX). In this series Satan has a lovely collection of Cliff Huxtable sweaters and Jesus is back as well, but as a Hispanic DJ, DJ Jesus (pronounced Hey-Zues not Gee-zuss). I'm telling you, check it out, you'll love it.

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If you thought Google Maps was cool (hey I can see my house from here and this is where I was yesterday), then you're going to love these pics showing a typical day in Britain from space. And if that didn't tickle your fancy perhaps you'd be more into photos from the World at Night Project.

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Well I think that's it for now, better get off to work, after all I've got some nearacles to work this morning.

Killing time . . .

Killing time, your life's on the line, killing time your turn to kill.

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Here's a video I found to be more than a little amusing, but then again I'm a bit of a geek, anyway if you too want to watch an extremely well edited video pitting Star Trek versus Star Wars click here. If not, why are you here anyway?

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It's no big secret that I'm a fan of Terry Pratchett's Discworld series of novels, but sadly Mr. Pratchett has been diagnosed with a form a Alzheimer's Disease and I say sad because that will mean an end to my beloved Discworld. But so it goes, anyway here's a good interview/article with Pratchett about what's what and the disease how things are going.

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Here's great news for fans of movies and getting hammered; according to this article two Cineplexes in Toronto are going to start serving alcohol. So no more having to sneak booze into the theatre . . . although at the rate that theatres jack up the cost of stuff at their concession stands a $15 rum and coke just might be enough to keep you refilling that flask . . . although I did pay $10 for an Irish Coffee at the hotel I stayed at last in Niagara Falls.

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No well, how's about a little giggity then? These pictures here of a woman dressed up as Harley Quinn are absolutely no help for my attraction to comic book girls.

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And today I'll leave you with Jingle Hells Bells. It's every bit as good as it sounds. I'm outta here, and I'm locking lasers on you.

Only 9 Shoplifting Days Until Christmas

I think that I should let you all know that I've found a new political leaning and leader in Chairman Meow. I think you'll all agree that he is the way to go and the new way of the future.

Remember 1987? Remember 20/20? Remember Stone Phillips? Remember how evil metal used to be? I'm looking at you Venom. Slightly related I watch Mythbusters Sunday night and Kari was wearing a Venom shirt. Throw up that metal salute kids.

Well check it all, here's some vintage Stone Phillips exposing heavy metal on 20/20 way back in, you guessed it, 1987. It focuses on the metal of the time, high school age metal fans, and stuff like the PMRC so it comes off really sensationalist, ill informed and douchey. No wonder people thought metal meant the end of youth and innocence. Did they say that about Elvis and the blues and dancing too? Bruce Dickinson of Iron Maiden is also interviewed. Clip 1 of 2 is here and 2 of 2 is here.

I'm sure you're all aware that Bettie Page was hospitalised after having a heart attack and has recently died at the age of 85 in LA. Why the bother? Well all you need is a Google Image Search to answer that question.

Well it's hard to get away from all things giftmasy at this time of the year, so I'm going to add to it with more Christmas music, but this time it's a collection of the 100 best down and out Christmas tunes.

This is one with 12 good bits of trivia that you may not already know about one of my favourite Christmas movies of all time, A Christmas Story.

Another hallmark of the end of the year is the year's best lists that keep popping up. This one ain't Christmasy but it's a nice compilation of some of the best viral videos (you know those jerky little clips that pop up on websites all over the net or that everyone emails to you after you emailed it to them?) of 2008. There is some definite win in there.

This is just flat out full of win as it's National Geographic's best photos of 2008. I wish I had the mad skills to be a Nat Geo photographer. I could probably pull off being a writer for the National Enquirer though . . . okay maybe not the Enquirer, but for sure the World Weekly News.

And lastly to help you out with your holly day shopping the good folks over at Signals are having a 20% off everything in stock sale. Enter Coupon Code RUDOLPH upon checkout to receive your discount. Sale ends at 11:59pm EST on December 18, 2008.

And I am outta here!

Half Hearted Entry

Got some time to kill between the airing of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and the Island of Misfits Toys and the Stephen Colbert Family Christmas Special and looking for something to do? Well look no longer, because here's an interesting quiz, 101 Amazing Earth Facts. I liked it but I like trivia.

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Since Chrimbo has come up again, how about taking a look over at The Ship of Fool's 12 Days of Kitschmas?

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I guess it was an act defiance, cheekiness or jingoism but according to this article prison work gangs of German soldiers from the Second World War planted a giant swastika in the bush. The article is missing something, something very important. A damned photo of the forest in question. Good thing Wikipedia is around with a photo in their write up on the subject.

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At least this site full of the mad and amazing designs and pictures that rice farmers have made in their paddies has pictures, and it's a damned good thing too because the site just comes up as gibberish on my computer. Must be an Asian font or something.

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In some news closer to home, I think this article proves that Winnipeg is fucked and the Royal Albert Arm's is one rough place. I mean how many other times have you read about an accused killer who admits to making an agreement with someone to be killed, cooked and eaten? And it's the guy on trial who wanted to be eaten. At least he had the common decency to want to be cooked first. Eating him raw would have been savagery.

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Here's an article for you that is proof that too much of a good thing is bad; seems that an Englishman has died from bleeding to death caused by over picking his nose. And here my mum only ever told me not to do it because my head would cave in.

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And here's a bit of news that made me weep a little; according to this article Corey Feldman says that Goonies 2 isn't going to happen. I think that I'll stay in my little bubble for a while longer and hold out hope for this film, because you know what they say, Goonies never die!

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Anyone wanna go on a Goonies Vacation?

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Well that's about her for now, but I will leave you with this lovely little comic about friends and dating. It made me laugh anyway.

Say What?

I'm not really sure if it's true or not, but I just read this and had to share, but apparently five years ago today Hitler became a Mormon. Yep you read that right none other than Der Fuhrer himself was baptised into the Church of Latter Day Saints in a ceremony held in their London temple.

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Apparently the CLDS uses this strange, well strange to me, retroactive baptism ceremony to ensure that other non-Mormon relatives/ancestors will be able to join them in heaven at the right hand of the Lord. I'm sure they draw line at pets though so Fido will have to stay in puppy heaven. Sorry about that.

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I don't know about you but that's a bit much for me, but what's the difference between baptising someone who no longer has the chance to decide for themselves and having babies baptised before they have the chance to? I wonder if the Mormons think it's okay to baptise anyone who isn't there or can't decide for themselves into their church or they just do it for the dearly departed?

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I dunno, but I think I'll stick to being a devout Pastafarian.

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All hail The Flying Spaghetti Monster. May he touch your lives with his noodley appendage.

If My Head Were Made of Veal . . .

. . . what would it be worth?

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Good news for those of you who got the reference there, according to this article The Kids in the Hall are coming back to the CBC and you know the article has to be accurate because it's being reported by the CBC. Granted from reading the article it doesn't sound like it's going to be the same sketch-com show they used to have, but I'm sure I'll still watch it . . . or at least want to watch it.

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Now the big question is, will they use another Shadowy Men on a Shadowy Planet song for the show's theme tune?

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After reading this article about a small town Saskatchewan woman who's death went unnoticed for 15 months I realised that there are many levels of hermitism to aspire to. Maybe some day you beloved reader can be that hermitty too. Gotta wonder how her utilities were being paid that whole time though.

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Scary stuff that, so much for the close knittedness of the small town lifestyle eh? But let's balance out the scary with some funny, or better than some funny how about a nice video clip putting together the funniest movie moments from 1997 - 2007? Yeah I thought you'd like that, there are some definite winners in there, some truly epic funny fo' sho'.

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Well that's her for now - but maybe you can help me out. I want to make some ribs, I want them ready when I get home from saving the world, aka work, so if anyone has a good slow cooker rib recipe they can recommend lemme have it.

Big. Frackin'. Moose. Part 2.

Some follow up pics to go with my previous Big Frackin' Moose entry.

On the first day of Giftmas my true love gave to me . . .

Well 'tis the season or close to it anyway, so let's get the giftmas flowing with some guy's collection of the top Christmas inspired music videos. I can say there are some real winners in that collections but I for one honestly cannot believe that The Fairytale of New York was left off that list - or hell any list of Christmas songs - I mean it's almost enough to make you want to go out and start a dysfunctional relationship with someone just so you can fight with each other like that. Only I hope your mental/special someone has a nicer smile than Shane MacGowan does.

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Although it's another one that I do enjoy I'm not as surprised that it didn't make that list, but it easily could have, Bob & Doug MacKenzie's (who are coming back to TV in cartoon form) 12 Days of Christmas. I mean who doesn't want five golden tuques and 7 packs of smokes?

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While we're rocking the 12 Days of Christmas, how's about taking a look at Twisted Sister's version of it, The Heavy Metal Christmas. In fact Twisted Sister released an entire Christmas record a couple years ago aptly called Twisted Christmas with twisted versions of other Christmas classics like Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas and Come All Ye Faithful.

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Where's Tipper Gore & the PMRC now?

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And since I've already started to metal up your Christmas record collection how's about taking a look at Monster Ballad Xmas which I'm sure you've figured out now consists of hair metal bands doing Christmas songs, like Skid Row doing Jingle Bells, Dokken rocking Santa Claus is Coming to Town and Tom Keifer, from Cinderella, having a Blue Christmas.

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And one last holiday song for today - forget about Sandler's Hanukkah Song because here's one for all your non-believing friends out there, The Atheism Song.

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I know I kinda missed the boat (pun entirely intended) on this one, but here's a bit of a great online graphic novel telling the story of the first Thanksgiving, The First Thanksgiving: An Almost Graphic Representation. Trust me it's worth the read, it made me laugh, but then again I'm a bad person.

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And from the bad news front, looks like everyone's favourite classic pinup girl, Ms Bettie Page, is critically ill after having a heart attack. I guess no matter how big a cult following you may or may not have sooner or later you will dance with the Reaper. Here's to speedy recovery. Here's Bettie in action from 1950 or maybe you prefer Bettie's pinup work? Or her bondage photos?

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Well that's her for now, but I will leave you with a list of the 11 Lamest Blogs on the Net, thankfully this one didn't make the list this time . . . hows about your's?

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That's it for today, now take off, eh.

Baby, if you ever wondered, wondered what ever became of me . . .

. . . I'm living on the air in Cincinnati, Cincinnati WKRP.

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If you were a fan of the show you might be pleased to know that a TV station in Cincinnati has changed their name to WKRP along with their upgrade to digital broadcast. You can read more about it here, but what else there to know?

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No word on whether or not it comes staffed with a wacky crew of misfits, but I'm sure there's a quirk or two in there. But can they compare to this motley crew? And don't forget that just because this guy broke dropping things down the back of someone's pants protocols doesn't mean that you can too. Everyone knows it's all right to drop something down the back of someone's pants, but you're not supposed to pull the pants away, you're to take advantage of the natural, or unnatural, gap that opens up.

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Hey I don't make the rules I just live by them . . . when it's convenient.

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Hey are you tired of not knowing what's going on when your friends, ah hell who am I kidding, your friend and/or the rest of your Guild in WoW, are talking about films? Well fret no longer because here's a great little video with 100 film spoilers in five minutes. You've got five minutes and trust me it's worth watching.

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And I have to share this in the interest of public safety; the bane of your schoolyard existence is back, and no I don't mean the wedgie, purple nurple or that really mean teacher who was old when she taught your mum. It's cooties and it just so happens that Scientists have proved that girls really do have them. Best stop by your best friend's house on your way to work this morning and get that long over due cootie vaccination before it's too late. Or maybe it already is.

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I'd also like to ask you all to join me in congratulating the City of Miami for the month of October as it was the first month in 42 years that the city didn't record a single homicide. Way to go! Although this is being congratulated for something that you should be doing anyway, so in a way it's kinda like getting a round of applause for not pissing all over your own shoes.

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Well not to end on too serious a note, but how about the upcoming non-confidence vote and the NDP/Liberal Coalition forming in the Federal Government? I can't speak for everyone, but does anyone in Parliament really think that another election will turn out differently than the one we voted in October? If anything people will be pissed off at the Coalition for forcing another election so soon and vote for the Conservatives in anger. Or maybe they'll protest vote it again throw some more votes at the Green Party.

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Although Jack Layton really does have a mustache that you could vote for . . . too bad he's not the MP for my riding.

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Well that's her for today, and remember only 22 more shoplifting days until giftmas.

Did you fire up your Advent Calender?

Seems that Advent started yesterday, and I still don't have a cheap ass advent calender with the the tiny bits of cheap chocolate, that are most likely actually brown wax, hiding behind each of the little perforated cardboard doors. Ah the memories . . . last year was at least 12 months ago.

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And even if it more than 12 days away, I'm going to share with you the 12 Days of Christmas, Winnipeg Style. This only even moderately amusing if you're at all familiar with the River City . . . although I'm glad they mentioned the stalled cars (I've been many places and I swear Winnipeg has the highest concentration of cars with hoods up in the left turn lane of anywhere . . . this is of course a purely subjective observation) but I am disappointed with the lack of mention of having your stolen. Maybe that hits a little too close to home though.

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The inclusion of the Go Jets Go sign is also a nice touch as well - I swear I can't go to any event in Winnipeg without there being a drunk jackass screaming "Go Jets Go". Someone should let the fine folks in Transcona know that they got their wish back in 1996 they went Jets went to Phoenix to become the Coyotes.

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But fear not delusional Winnipeg hockey fans, you might not support the Moose and may not have supported the Jets and NHL salaries may be growing exponentially, but you've got a new arena so the Jets are on their way back . . . some day . . . maybe.

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No matter, back to the important thing, Giftmas. In case you've got a geek or two no your card list perhaps you'd be interested in one of these 11 sweet Christmas Cards for that special pocket protector sporting, calculator watch wearing, comic book reading, D&D playing person in your life. Trust even if you don't think these are funny, they will. Don't ask how I know that though.

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And of course more important than cards or trees or any of that is the oh so special television holiday special, and you're in luck because EW has compiled their 25 favourites here. I don't know about you, but Dr Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas narrated by Mr. Boris Karloff is a definite must watch for me.

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But maybe you're more a punker and Fear's Fuck Christmas is more up your alley.

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That's her for now, until next time GO JETS GO!