Happy Newspaper Day

Today is that great day in our great town when the local weekly paper (it's mostly advertising, shit even some of the articles are thinly veiled adverts for local businesses. The best part of the paper is the crimes and/or court in brief. Everyone, except for me that is, complains that it shouldn't be in the paper, but there isn't anyone who doesn't read it) comes out, and no matter where you around this little town nestled on the shores of Pelican Lake you will find people at their jobs who should be working, but instead reading the paper. It's funny because no one thinks there's anything wrong with this and if even you go up to the counter in one of the local shops, when one of the local shops that's still open, and find the clerk reading the paper instead of snapping to attention and ringing up your purchases it's A-okay . . . as long as it's Wednesday morning. Try that shit on a Thursday and you're a lazy bastard not worthy of your post behind the till.

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What a difference a day can make.

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So here's some good news for migraine sufferers - seems that some eggheads out there have built a handheld magnetic device that when used during the "aura" phase of the migraine has had good success in easing the pain of the headache. You can read more about this machine here. I wonder if just sticking some rare earth magnets to my melon would be as effective?

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This is good news, although not all migraine sufferers experience the aura, I know personally I don't always get it as a warning to the headache, but it's not uncommon for my vision to go wonky (blurry or seeing spots) while having one.

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I had someone, no doubt a dirty hippy, recommend a Tyramine Free Diet to help with my brain pains. So of course that meant a trip to my friendly neighbourhood interweb to find out just what the shit they were jabbering about. Turns out that I heart tyramines and don't know that I want to give them up . . . I mean look at all the good stuff they're in - aged cheeses, some aged and cured meats, sauerkraut and draft beer. Can you imagine life with a chunk of sharp cheddar, a slab of Genoa salami, a lashing of sauerkraut on your sausage and fresh pint of Stella or Kilkenny to warsh it down? I know I can't . . . well I could but I don't want to.

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Although I'm sad to say that inside of the last year or so I've had to limit my intake of dark beers, stouts and like . . . and sadly that means no more getting completely shittered on Guinness. I can still handle a pint of the black stuff, but even a few of them sets off a horrible migraine, and trust me it's not just a hangover. I know the difference.

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That's enough of that don't you think? Hey remember a couple posts back I mentioned that my local municipal environmental committee wanted to ban plastic bags in town? Well check this out, seems that a Waterloo high school student has figured out how to break the bags down in months instead of the usual billions (picture Dr. Evil now) of years. Now that is brilliant, and the kid's just in high school. What did you accomplish in high school, besides finishing Super Mario and barely mastering removing a bra (although I'm sure if you're reading this and you've always been a female you probably had that down pat pretty quick . . . but have you tried to see if it's as easy to remove someone else's bras as your own? If you'd like to give it a go, let me know because I think that's something I'd like to watch . . . in the interest of science . . . and junk).

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Well that's it for now - and don't forget, THIS IS SPRINGFIELD!